Disappointments often result in learning great lessons.
This brings me to memories of when my sons were avid hockey players, playing for AAA teams. Winning and losing were valuable lessons they learned as well as “how” to win or lose, courteously. Being a part of a team taught them camaraderie, responsibility, and a desire to improve through hard work. Nevertheless, when a season would end without going to the finals, or winning the annual championship, they learned disappointment.
At my age, I have encountered many disappointments. They have tempered me — caused me to re-evaluate my desires and goals.
Last year’s earth-shattering disappointment came when my son died. Disappointment of cancer having claimed his life, taught me many, many, many lessons that only those of us who have lost a child can know, or understand. Since then, I seek simplicity in my life. I cherish moments with clarity.
I also continued to enjoy working in our large yard — 1.3 acres. But this year, last month, while working in the yard, I damaged my neck and shoulder. My neck had already been in bad shape since a very bad car wreck in ’96, but, my attitude was that as long as I was not paralyzed, I was going to thankfully “use” my body. And, I have used my body, pushed it hard, and reveled in the pleasure of seeing the beautiful results of my gardens.
My first reaction to this nearly debilitating pain was anger. I am not the type of person who enjoys sitting. I would much rather be outside, cultivating, communing with Nature. I tried doing small outdoor chores which only aggravated my painful condition even more. Finally, when the pain was intense enough to wake me from a deep sleep every night for a week, with pain akin to someone sticking a huge knitting needle through the cap of my shoulder, through to my neck, I surrendered to the fact that I must take time to heal.
Not being able to do things requiring the use of two arms has limited even my indoor activities. My home is collecting dust, my carpets need vacuuming. I am not at ease in my home, find it difficult to relax if the house is not spotless. I am, however, learning through the disappointing limitations of my injury, that I must accept these temporary situations, and put my priorities in proper perspective. I must accept, and respect the rules laid out for proper healing, no matter how long it will take.
Patience is a life-long lesson for me. This time, however, through all of the accumulated lessons from disappointment, I am learning to live-in-the-moment rather than dwell upon what I would rather be doing. This is one of the greatest lessons I will learn from disappointment — to live in the moment. To see and enjoy the beauties of Nature as I sit on my patio, watching the birds eat at our feeders, and bathe joyfully in their baths.
When my lesson is completed, and my neck/shoulder are healed, I will be more grateful than ever to return to transcription, and working in the yard.
For the Daily Post: Disappointment