Secret Diagnosis

So, I went for the CT Scan and was told it is safe for me to go home, BUT, if I don’t feel good or have any bad (ambiguous) symptoms get to an ER.  Duh?!

I hate having to wait the whole weekend to find out what the heck they found, if anything.  It must not be an embolism or they would not have sent me home. I still have breathing troubles, something is still wrong and I do not have a diagnosis.


17 responses to “Secret Diagnosis

  1. Ugh… the waiting is the worst. Me? I go crazy diagnosing myself on the Internet. Usually its nowhere near as bad as my own diagnosis, but one time I actually got it right before the dr even saw the scan results… ugh.


    • This just bothers me because before my surgery, more than 3 months ago, I had so much energy and no breathing problems, this is taking WAY too long to regain my energy after the initial bilateral mastectomy. I’m wondering what the heck they did to me… maybe they punctured something, after all, they had to replace that one tissue expanders because it had FIVE pin-prick holes in it!!


      • Wow… if you don’t get an answer soon you NEED to go somewhere else. Even an ER at a different hospital from where you had the surgery.

        Doctors are human after all… always remember that.

        If you aren’t getting what you need, find someone who will give it to you. The doctors do work for the patients after all. Many people forget this and let themselves get lost in the herd that doctors seem to shuffle in and out of their offices these days.

        I am sending positivity and prayers your way. Please, be your own advocate and do whatever you need to do. You know your body better than any doctor ever could.

        Please if you need to talk or vent, you can email me

        Hugs, Kat


        • You are an angel! I’m at home, waiting for tomorrow, Monday, taking it easy, sewing curtains and convincing myself that whatever is wrong with me will be simple, like, maybe un-diagnosed pneumonia. I’m trusting that the radiologist was certain that whatever it is, it isn’t immediately life threatening. I just need to keep my mind busy and away from imagining other diagnosis!

          And thank you again and again for being who you are, a beautiful spirit in a beautiful human being! XX Sue


          • Aww 🙂 I wish I could take all the worry and the pain away. Stress makes pain worse. You would think doctors would realize that and make things easier on patients.

            You are going to be just fine. I can feel it.


  2. Dammit! Dammit! Sorry this is turning into such an ordeal. Just try to stay cool and be like a cat. Just take on the feline nonchalance about EVERYTHING. Move slowly and deliberately and park yourself in a morning sunbeam if you can. Thinking of you and sending positive MOJO your way.


  3. Hey, hang in there!
    Sending lots of happy your way. 🙂


  4. It takes more than a few months to bounce back from a bilateral mastectomy. Healing the incision is not the same as being back to what you were before the surgery. I was surprised how long it took me. I don’t know why I was surprised. We underestimate how major the surgery is … and how “bouncable” we are. It was close to a year before I felt like “me” again. I was surprised, but all those nasty hormone supressors knock you on your butt. Even after you stop taking them, it is months before they are fully out of your system.

    I’m sorry about the lack of a diagnosis. They could give you at least a “looks ok” (like they used to) and not leave you hanging, but all these “privacy” laws — really intended to protect doctors and hospitals from getting sued — make it impossible. It’s cruel and unusual punishment.


    • Thanks for the support Teepee! You know, I’ve been comparing myself to other relatives who had gone through ‘similar’ bilateral mastectomies, but, the keyword is “similar.” There are age differences, different types of breast cancer and I’m sure the surgeries themselves were not identical to one another, thus, our recoveries would be different too. I need to be a more patient patient.

      Oh well, 24 hours from now I will be on the phone with my family doctor and hear the results. Thanks so VERY much for sharing your thoughts with me!!


      • Patience is really hard. In addition to the physical healing, I think we ALL get depressed. It would be hard NOT to get depressed. I had to battle my way out of a black pit. I did it, faster than usual — just a couple of months — probably because I’ve been there before and I know the drill. But that pit sucks.

        You’re younger than me I think. I’m actually surprised I didn’t get hit younger My mother was in her early 40s, so when I made it into my 60s with no diagnosis, I figured I was home free. What happened was that I had been ill with other things — hadn’t gotten a mammogram in 6 years. There’s no way to know how long one or both tumors were there. My guess is quite a while, but they were very slow growing and non-agressive,as breast cancer goes.

        For ANY woman losing both breasts is MAJOR surgery, whatever the kind of tumor. It’s a massive assault on your body. It causes a lot of stress on the musculature of your chest and the pain may never entirely go away. Those nasty hormone suppressors also make other conditions — like fibro and arthritis flare. Adds greatly to the misery factor.

        Younger is better, but having your breasts hacked off, even with reconstruction is no small thing. It’s a double amputation of a particularly intimate kind.

        If you’ve never read it: I’m going to republish it. That was witten slightly more than a year ago– onr year post op.


        • Thank you for putting things into common-sense perspective. I turned 60 in September of this year, that is 15 years younger than when my Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer and only had the one breast removed. She did not have reconstructive surgery. I don’t recall her complaining of anything, but, she didn’t have as invasive a procedure as mine either.

          The truth is, now that I’ve already had cancer once, I’m scared that there is another cancer lurking… maybe in my lungs. I need to Be Calm and go do something fun… after I phone the doc’s office.

          Thanks again for sharing your thoughts and your own story, there are so many similarities I’m finding.


          • Sharing is our primary defense against fear and despair. We are ALL sure we’ve got cancer somewhere. Even if we haven’t already had it. It’s a permanent state of paranoia, fed by the nightly TV news segment of “Guess what’s killing us today?”


  5. Yikes… that is certainly alarming; I hate how you have to wait to hear back but like you said– surely it’s nothing TOO scary or they wouldn’t have sent you home.
    I hope everything is alright– let us know!


  6. I hope today has brought you good news, or is about to. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog. I’m more than grateful and a bit ashamed! Here’s me complaining about stage fright! Maybe it’s done me good, to reassess my priorities! Still, I do know what it’s like, waiting, even for 5 minutes, to hear ‘one way or the other’. Ann


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